One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, "Tell me, April, who created the universe?"

When April didn't stir, little Johnny, a boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear. "GOD ALMIGHTY!" shouted April and the teacher said, "Very good" and April fell back asleep.

A while later the teacher asked April, "Who is our Lord and Saviour," But, April didn't even stir from her slumber. Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again. 'JESUS CHRIST!" shouted April and the teacher said, "very good," and April fell back to sleep.

Then the teacher asked April a third question. "What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?" And again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin. This time April jumped up and shouted, "IF YOU STICK THAT F*****G THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME, I'LL BREAK IT IN HALF AND STICK IT UP YOUR ARSE!"

-Bub- wrote A mother was working in the kitchen listening to her son playing with his new electric train in the living room.She heard the train stop and her son said, "All of you sons of **** who want off, get the hell off now, cause this is the last stop! And all of you sons of **** who are getting on, get your **** in the train, cause we're going down the tracks."The horrified mother went in and told her son, "We don't use that kind of language in this house!! Now I want you to go to your room and you are to stay there for TWO HOURS. When you come out, you may play with your train, but I want you to use nice language."Two hours later, the son came out of the bedroom and resumed playing with his train. Soon the train stopped and the mother heard her son say, "All passengers who are disembarking the train, please remember to take all of your belongings with you. We thank you for riding with us today and hope your trip was a pleasant one. We hope you will ride with us again soon."She hears the little boy continue, "For those of you just boarding, we ask you to stow all of your hand luggage under your seat. Remember, there is no smoking on the train. We hope you will have a pleasant and relaxing journey with us today."As the mother began to smile, the child added, "For those of you who are pissed off about the TWO HOUR delay, please see the b!tch in the kitchen."

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL That made my day!

LMFAO 4: (THIS IS FUNNIEST)

The Only Headshot you ever get is from your Boyfriend.



ada) sn))((

global warming is a myth just like womens rights

Not that funny?

Ok, Here goes.
This Pie Walked into a bar.
He Said, Yo Bartender Gimme A Hotpocket.
The Bartender said OK
The Bartender Came Back And Punched The Pie In the face and said...

THATS GROSS

lol

iDeagle wrote

You're so fat you looked like a giant to Mr. Sumo.

You're so ugly Nanny Mc-Phee kidnapped you.

You're so dumb, You sat on the television and watched the sofa.

You're so desperate you had babies with your dog.

You're so gay, Gock rejected you.

You're so fat, Dr. Who couldn't go back into time to make you skinny.

You're so fat you gained weight from people running around you.

You're so gay, New York City rejected you.

8)

im a new yorker.... in LI....

What did the penis say to the condom?
"Cover me, im going in!"