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the best yo momma jokes ever
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the best yo momma jokes everPosted:

weedavid
  • Junior Member
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Status: Offline
Joined: Jun 17, 201113Year Member
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Yo momma so fat, scientists have declared her ass to be the 10th planet.

Yo momma's so stupid, she got hit by a parked car.

Your momma's so poor she can't even pay attention!

Your mamma is so fat she's on both sides of the family.

Your mamma is so fat when we were having sex I rolled over 9 times and I was still on the BITCH!!!!!

Yo momma so ugly your Grandma threw her on the street and was charged for littering.

Yo momma so fat the last time she saw 90210 was on the scale!

Yo momma so ugly, she walked into Taco Bell and everyone ran for the border.

Yo momma is like a toilet; fat, white, and smells like shit !!

Yo momma is like a bowling ball, gets picked up fingered, thrown in the gutter and bitch comes back for more.

Your mamma is so poor she was kicking a can down the street, asked what she was doing and she said moving.

Yo momma is like a bottle of ketchup, she gets turned around, banged, and then she comes out slow.

Your mother is like a doorknob.... everyone gets a turn!

Your mom is like a race car driver, she burns 50 rubbers a day.

Your momma is like a vacuum cleaner, she sucks, blows and gets laid in the closet.

Your mothers so fat, they tie a rope around her shoulders and drag her through a tunnel when they want to clean it.

Yo momma's so stupid she thought a quarterback is a refund.

Yo momma's glasses are so thick when she looks at a map she sees people waving.

Yo momma's hair so greasy when she gets in the car the oil light comes on.

Yo momma is a carpenter's dream...she's flat as a board and she's never been screwed.

Yo momma is so fat she has more chins than a Chinese phonebook.

Yo momma is so fat her blood type is rocky road.

Yo momma is so fat when God said let there be light, he said move your fat butt out of the way.

Yo momma is so dumb she got hit by a park car.

Yo momma is so dumb she tripped over a cordless phone.

Yo momma is so fat she uses a mattress as a tampon.

Yo momma is so fat she put on a pair of Guess Jeans and the answer popped out.

Yo momma's so fat, she irons her clothes on the drive way!

Yo momma's glasses are so thick, when she looks at a map she sees people waving.

Yo momma's so fat, she was floating in the ocean and Spain claimed her for the new world!

Yo momma's so ugly, when you look up "ugly" in the dictionary, there's a picture of her!

Yo momma's so short, she does back flips under the bed!

Yo momma is like a shotgun, one **** and she'll blow

Yo momma's so fat she can't even fit in the chat room.

Yo Momma's so fat she gets her toenails painted at Lucky's Auto Body.

Your momma's armpits so stink she put on Right Guard and it went left.

Your momma's like a hardware store, 5 cents a screw.

Your momma's house is so small, when you buy a large pizza you have to go outside and eat it

Your momma's so hairy they filmed Gorillas in the Mist in her shower!

Yo momma's got more mileage then a New York city taxi.

Yo momma's face is so pimply that her tears need a 4x4 to get down her face.

Yo momma's so loose, she jerks herself with the fat end of a baseball bat.

Yo momma so poor when I rang the doorbell she stuck her head out the window and yelled ding dong.

Yo momma so stupid, she took a spoon to the Super Bowl.

Yo momma's so poor, she has to hang toilet paper out to dry.

Yo momma's so poor, when I stepped on a lit match in her house, she yelled "Who turned off the furnace"!

Yo momma's so poor, she can't get rid of the roaches in her house 'cause they pay half the rent!

Yo momma's feet are so crusty, when she walks on a wooden floor, it sounds like she's tap dancing.

Yo momma's like a pie, everybody gets a piece.

Yo momma's so fat that when she asked for a water bed, they threw a blanket over the pacific ocean.

Yo momma's like a "Happy Meal" small, cheap and greasy!

Your momma's so fat, your family pictures have to be taken by a satellite!

Your momma's like the village bicycle, everybody gets a ride.

Yo momma's got a party in her mouth tonight, and everybody's cumming.

Yo momma's so short, she can sit on a dime and swing her legs.

Yo mama so skinny her pyjamas only have one stripe.

Your mommas so ugly the army doesn't use guns any more, they use her picture.

You're mama is so poor that she chases the garbage truck with a shopping list.

Yo momma is so fat she caught a flesh-eating virus... and that was three years ago.

Yo momma so short she can hang glides Doritos.

Your mother is so fat she asked for a water bed and they put a blanket over the ocean.

Yo Momma's so fat, when she walks by the TV I miss a season of Friends.

Yo momma's so stupid she sold her car for gas money.

Yo mamma so old she has the autographed version of the Bible.

Yo Mamas so stupid she locked herself in the bathroom and pissed her pants.

Yo mama's so poor, she chases a garbage truck with a grocery list!

Yo momma so ugly all the neighbours pitched in for curtains.

Yo momma's so short she did a suicide jump off the curb.

Yo momma's so short, you could see her feet on her driver license.

Yo momma's so stupid, she call you a son of a bitch.

Yo momma's so fat she's got more rolls than a bakery.

Yo momma is so fat she falls off both sides of the bed.

Yo momma so fat we had to hire a RODEO CLOWN to bring in the grocers!

Yo momma so old her birth certificate expired
#2. Posted:
RIG
  • Rising Star
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Joined: Nov 19, 201113Year Member
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Yo mama so skinny her pyjamas only have one stripe.


WTF who comes up with this ****?
#3. Posted:
Extazc
  • TTG Senior
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Loool Bro that is some funny shit , but i think this is in the wrong section try Jokes and Funny thing
#4. Posted:
RvB
  • TTG Contender
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Yo momma so fat, scientists have declared her **** to be the 10th planet.
There's only 8 planets.
#5. Posted:
Comedy
  • Wise One
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Joined: Oct 29, 201113Year Member
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Joined: Oct 29, 201113Year Member
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We have a joke section you know.

Forums/f=5/jokes-funny-stuff.html

Not sure if you will post your 'Mum jokes' there
#6. Posted:
Homepage
  • TTG Master
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Status: Offline
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Sorry but you have to be immature to find these.
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