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Funniest joke you've ever heard? +Rep for good jokes.
Posted:
Funniest joke you've ever heard? +Rep for good jokes.Posted:
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Joined: Apr 08, 201212Year Member
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I was just wondering what the funniest joke you guys have ever heard.
I will give rep to people who have good input and put some funny jokes onto this thread!
I will give rep to people who have good input and put some funny jokes onto this thread!
#2. Posted:
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Joined: Aug 27, 201212Year Member
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Joined: Aug 27, 201212Year Member
Posts: 248
Reputation Power: 9
An Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman are all builders working on a bridge. The Englishman opens his lunch-box and looks inside to see what his wife made him and says, If My wife makes me one more tuna sandwich, Im going to jump off this bridge. The Scotsman opens his lunch box and says, If I get one more ham sandwich, Im going to jump off this bridge. The Irishman then says, If I get one more egg sandwich, Im going to jump off this bridge. The next day, all three get the same lunch, all three jump off the bridge, and all three die. At their funeral, the Englishmans wife says, If only Id known he didnt like tuna. The Scotsmans wife says, If only Id known he didnt like ham. The Irishmans wife says, I dont understand it. He made his own sandwiches.
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#3. Posted:
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Joined: Apr 03, 201212Year Member
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I'm not sure if I remember this one entirely, so forgive me if it's not as funny as it could be.
So there are three men taking a very long hike, when suddenly they are ambushed, kidnapped and taken away. When they get there, one of the men that took them says: "For your freedom, you must go and find me 10 of the same kind of fruit each!"
So the the first man comes back with 10 apples, and the kidnapper says to him: "You must fit them all up your ass, and you will be free. However, if you make any kind of facial expression, you will be shot." He gets to two apples and screams, and is shot.
The next man comes back with 10 grapes. Again, the kidnapper says: "You must fit them all up your ass, and you will be free. However, if you make any kind of facial expression, you will be shot." The man gets to 9 grapes, and bursts out laughing, and is shot and killed also.
In heaven, the first man says to the second: "Why did you laugh? You were so close!"
So the first man replies: "I saw the next guy come back with 10 pineapples"
So there are three men taking a very long hike, when suddenly they are ambushed, kidnapped and taken away. When they get there, one of the men that took them says: "For your freedom, you must go and find me 10 of the same kind of fruit each!"
So the the first man comes back with 10 apples, and the kidnapper says to him: "You must fit them all up your ass, and you will be free. However, if you make any kind of facial expression, you will be shot." He gets to two apples and screams, and is shot.
The next man comes back with 10 grapes. Again, the kidnapper says: "You must fit them all up your ass, and you will be free. However, if you make any kind of facial expression, you will be shot." The man gets to 9 grapes, and bursts out laughing, and is shot and killed also.
In heaven, the first man says to the second: "Why did you laugh? You were so close!"
So the first man replies: "I saw the next guy come back with 10 pineapples"
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#4. Posted:
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Do you like dragons?
Cause I'll be dragon my balls on your face! :trollin:
Cause I'll be dragon my balls on your face! :trollin:
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#5. Posted:
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LOL
Last edited by iCustom ; edited 1 time in total
Last edited by iCustom ; edited 1 time in total
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#6. Posted:
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I have a bunch but cant post them
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#7. Posted:
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Matt_Kemp wrote I have a bunch but cant post them
Oh that's funny!
/sarcasm
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#8. Posted:
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Statistically 9/10 people enjoy gang r*pe.
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#9. Posted:
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Statistically 1/7 dwarves are happy
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#10. Posted:
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Statistics show, 97% of black people have had sex in the shower.
The other 3% hasn't been to jail yet.
Please do not take this offensively just trying to be funny!
The other 3% hasn't been to jail yet.
Please do not take this offensively just trying to be funny!
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