I was born on April 10th, 1937 to the late Idessa Butler and Willie Butler- 96 years old. I was born at 6:35 am on April 10th. I am the seventh child born to this union. I am also the baby of this union.

My mother died in 1938. She had a stroke. She was in labor (childbirth). During those day's there wasn't many doctors and if there was a doctor, he was miles away. Transportation was by wagon or car that had a crank. You know crank up the car more. Medical care was not given in time as a result my mother died. I never saw a picture of my mom. In those days the family photos were usually kept in a bible. Well the houses burned down the picture was in the bible it burned up. Although I never say my mom, I do have strong memories of her. Every chance I get, I ask people about her. They said she was a beautiful black woman, kind and loving. The night before she died she washed all of our clothes, gathered a lot of food, prayed over each child individually and instructed my father to take good care of her children and gave up the ghost, died 1938.

I was named after my grandmother Mary Eubanks. My grandmother asked my dad if she could raise me and dad consented. I lived with my grandmother from 9 months 'til I was thirteen years old, because she was getting older, I was getting older where I needed more attention when I was fourteen I went to live with my father and step mother who lived in the city McComb, Mississippi. I am the first of my immediate family to finish high school. I attended Amite County grammar school for eight years. I used to walk on the dirt road through the pastures and fields for three miles each way. I never had any one to help me with my lesson, but I never failed a class. Thank God. My life with my grandmother was good, however she had her younger children there, my Uncle Charlie and Uncle Bud. She was so busy raising her kids and all the other kids and grandkids until she couldn't keep watch over us. My uncles Charlie and Bud would rape me and then tell me if you tell I am going to beat you up. So, I didn't tell. I was too afraid. I was so uncomfortable from the men you know there were grown and I was a little girl. Sometime I was too sore to play. My grandmother would say, "Honey, what's wrong?" Of course, I didn't tell her because I was afraid to tell. I was very lonely and afraid.

I also had a "mean old grandfather". They were sharecroppers who farmed from March to October. They never made any clear money. After each season Mr. Son McCurrun would say, "You didn't clear any money". So we worked again, again and again no profit.

My grandfather Jim Eubanks would get drunk every weekend. He was so mean to my grandmother. He would get drunk and come home and threaten to kill us. My grandmother would get all of us out of bed and we would to hide in the woods. I wasn't as afraid of him as I was the darkness and the snakes! It always amazed me that my grandmother would accept that kind of treatment. However after having my own family, I can understand that back in those days, there wasn't an alternative. We made it through each farm season. I couldn't understand either, how one could work over and over again year after year and not clear any profit. I was young, but I wasn't dumb. In those days, you dare not speak your mind, you wouldn't know if you'd get a hand slap across your mouth or a belting on your naked behind.

Memories of my sisters and brothers

Sometimes, I would go to visit my other sister's and brothers who lived about ten miles west of me, my one sister L.V. who is three and a half years older that me, was always jealous of me. She would fool me to come home. Honey I have a doll, some new clothes etc. When I would get a long way from my grandmother and visit my siblings they didn't have anything. My sister would fool me and when I would get there it was another trick. She played that trick over and over again. She's still playing the same old games. She's 64 years old. L.V. have always been jealous of me. She still is today. She seems to always find some way to hurt me.

Once she confessed to me about her jealousy, she got pregnant at fourteen, got married at fifteen. She had six children by the time she was 20. On the other hand, I was very popular in high school and she wanted to be like me. She explained this to me and she asked me to forgive her. I did. I said to myself this is final, all over, but it was only temporary. It's worst now. In fact, she is vicious, angry, mad, mean, and it's scary. I am actually afraid to be alone with her because she has so much anger and bitterness and forgiveness. When I point out these things to her she gets violent so I had to pray forgive her and stay away from her hoping she'll come to herself before it's too late.

My oldest sister Essie Lee is 71 years old. I stayed (lived) with her for two years, my sophomore through graduation. She was as nice to me as she knew how to be. She was a widow. Her husband got killed in World War II. She drank a lot, but when she was sober she was like a mother. I learned from her mistake. I promised myself that I would never drink.

My oldest brother Jimmy Lee is 68 years old. He is my big brother. He and his wife have seven children. Jimmy Lee is quite a guy. He had his home build from the ground 30 years ago. We didn't think he had a dime because he always played broke, but he did. He said he would spend fifty cents and save fifty cents. That's how he was able to build a new brick home. He lives in McComb, Ms.

My sister Idessa Coleman died in 1979. She had lung cancer. She was a jewel, kind, sweet. She had four children. She was one of the first people's to help integrate the schools in Mississippi. She was also one of the first blacks to work in a factory in Mississippi. Her boss liked her so much that when she died; he hired her oldest son to replace her. He's still there as a supervisor.

familyMy brother Robert (66 years old) who was married for 28 years, is responsible for me being here in Chicago. He and his wife used to buy me clothes when I was in high school. Robert is the brain in the family. He started his own business way back in 1960. He started washing big trucks and now he has a construction company called father and son. They had seven children. Their fourth child died in 1970, Pamela of sickle cell anemia, which is a family trait. Their oldest daughter Linda was a mother of three and a registered nurse died at age 37, five years ago. She had asthma. She was like a daughter.

My brother Edward (62 years old) has four children. Edward just retired from Pepsi-Cola after 38 years employed. He is the manipulative and control one in the family. If you have an idea he'll take it and tell you what to pay. I used to really get upset over it, but I've learned to let him do what he wants and if I don't approve it, I won't participate.

My brother Theodore is 47 years old. He was like a genius in school. He went to Vietnam. He had a nervous breakdown, now he lives in a half way house for mental disturbed people.

My sister Johnnye Ruth is 45 and has two boys. We are very close. She recently moved to Atlanta, Ga., formerly of Grand Rapids, Mi. She works for General Motors. Johnny and I can talk for hours and days. We are very good friends.

Mary4Velma is 50 years old and has three children. While growing up we were cousins (Smile) My dad and Velma's mother were dating shortly after my mother died. Velma's mother was my mother's niece. (Oh!) So they lied and said we were cousins. When Velma was 20 years old she was told the truth. It was difficult at first, because Velma blamed the family, my sisters and brothers. Later, we became friends, but after she met Johnnye Ruth, she went back in her own world. She won't return phone calls or anything. See Johnnye Ruth, Theodore, and Velma are from three different women my father was married to Johnnye Ruth and Theodore mothers.

Memories of my Grandparents

My grandmother on my mother's side of the family was Mary Eubanks. She raised me because my mother Idella Butler died when I was less than a year old. She was a good grandma. She worked very hard to care for her children and a host of other grandchildren. I can remember walking for miles with my grandmother to work. She used to go and wash clothes for the Caucasian people. Her pay was 50 cents a day. She would draw the well water, wash the clothes, rub them on a rub board, hang the clothes out on the clothesline to let them dry, then she would take them down, iron them and put them away all for 50 cents and whatever meats, flour or other commodities the people would give her. My grandmother really loved me. I was named after her and I was her deceased daughter's baby, therefore, I was special. It caused a lot of problems within my immediate family, because my siblings were not treated as well with my dad and stepmother. So, whenever I would go to visit them they would be real mean to me.

My grandfather on my mother's side was so mean to my grandmother and their children, but not to me.

I don't remember my grandmother on my dad's side, However, I remember my grandfather. He was mean! He had a stiff leg. He was considered rich for a black man in the early 1900's. He owned a lot of land. The land was rich in produce. He had peaches, pears, apples, cherries, grapes, pecans, walnuts. He also had hired people working for him. Before he died in the late 1940's, he asked my dad not so sell the land, but to keep it in the family. My dad had two sisters and eight brothers. My dad didn't listen to his dad. Several years after my grandfather died my father sold the property. Several monthes later oil was found on the property. My dad sold the land for $10,000 and each sibling received $1000 each. My dad really felt bad after the oil was found on the land, because he didn't listen to his father. My brother, Robert had offered to buy the land to keep it is the family, but my father didn't listen to him either.

High School

mary3 picI started High school, Burglund High School McComb, Mo. My principle was Mr. C.D. Higgins. My favorite teacher was Ms. Ginn. Here to the right is her picture. Ms. Ginn was so stern they called her Sergeant. So, no one failed her class. She didn't allow it. She is still alive today, in California and she is 100 years old. That is a long ways from Tylertown, Ms.! She was a great woman, stern, but good. You couldn't get away from anything! I am truly grateful for Mrs. Ginn because she helped to instill in me the highest. I became an "A" student in math and Algebra because of her sternness.

The subject I liked best is school was Home Economics. The reason I liked it was because I liked to cook and sew. My second favorite was math. Back then they called it Arithmetic. History was my third favorite, english fourth. I was also in the band where I was in and out. I started with the flute and the piano. I wasn't consistent, I was a drop out.

I was a cheerleader for four years. I was very popular in school. I dated the fooodball stars. I had four good girlfriends, Mable, Dora Mae, Deloris and Laverne. Laverne was my favorite friend. We decided to tell each other everything about our lives including sex. The way we became friends was that Laverne was thin and cute, and I was heavy. I was jealous of her. I would tease her. One day our ninth grade teacher, Miss Wade over heard us arguing she said, "Go outside and fight!" We went outside and became friends. She is still my best friend today after 46 years. Amen. Laverne didn't keep her promise about telling all her secrets. When we were in the tenth grade, there was a rumor going around in class, Laverne is pregnant. I got so angry and I said "No, She's not. She's not having sex." But when I went to Laverne, she started crying and she said, "Mary I am pregnant." I was so angry and shocked. I had introduced Laverne to my friend Robert. They eventually got married. Laverne had to loose a year out of school to have her baby. She graduated in 1957, a year after I graduated. You can see I have a pattern of people disappointing me for years.

MB_2After graduating from high school I moved to Chicago, Il. And Lavern and Robert moved to Milwaukee, Wi. She and Robert got a divorce 14 years later. However, I spent I year with them in 1963 when I divorce my own husband. They were good to my son and me. Gregory, my son was 6 years old and Laverne's son Robert was 8 and her son Reginald was 5. Laverne is presently married to Isiah. Robert, Laverne and Isaih are very good friends today.

I graduated from high school May 29, 1956, and I came to Chicago on September 1, 1957. I was so happy to see the bright lights in Chicago, only to discover the next morning, that it was dirty.