This was copied and pasted but i had to edit the faults and stuff so i put plenty of my on work into it! Please don't hate!

Dempsey

"Tank Dempsey! Kickin' ass and making messes!"
When Dempsey is killing a lot of zombies.
"Uhhh...did you guys a voice? "
Dempsey asking the others about the mysterous voice. (Gersh)
"Who would of thought a little girl could cause sooo much trouble!?""
Dempsey when Pack-a-punching a gun.
"Bye-bye box."
Getting a Teddy Bear.
"Hey, check it out, black and white bitches!"
Starting a game.
"It was all Nikolai's fault!"
After being revived
"Wow, you're all so limp and... wow... (laughs)"
When getting multi kills with the Thundergun
"Some things get better with age, Revive soda's not one of them!"
After buying Quick Revive
"I'll send you back to space, monkey bones!"
Getting attacked by a Space Monkey.
"Back off Monkey!... die!"
Dempsey after killing a Space monkey
"Hey, Treyarch! Can we get a new objective, please?"
When starting a new game.
"Is it just me or did anyone else hear a voice?"
When starting a new game.
"Hey, what happened to all the color?"
When starting a new game.
"No one can ever tell me why there's always a big switch to find. Seriously."
When starting a new game.
"Whoa man, I didn't know I was that good. Oh wait, yeah I did!"
When killing a large group of zombies.
"I think that one hit the sky. Holy crap!"
When killing a zombie with the Thunder Gun.
"Everyone says Tak is boring. That might be true. But you always need that one stale player to make everyone else seem cooler."
Said When Pack-a-Punching a Weapon
"Yeah yeah, there's no power. HOLY CRAP, NO COLOR EITHER!!"
When starting a new game.
"Hey let go of my hand grenade!!!"
After getting the Matryoshka dolls.

"What's this?"
After getting the Matryoshka Doll from the Mystery Box.
"NOT A CHANCE IN HELL!"
After knifing a zombie.
"Yeah, yeah. Found the song. Whatever."
Upon finding the secret song
"I told you not to touch me BONE-JUNKEY!!"
After killing a zombie that attacked him.
"I sure hope that was a good idea"
After completing the final power node.
"Hey what's up Tak?"
After talking to his matryoshka doll with Takeo.
"Nothing left in my guns."
When out of ammo.
"This one is MINE!!!"
When receiving a weapon from the Pack-A-Punch machine.
"Dude, get me some ammo!"
When out of ammo.
"Look at the poor, evil doctor all surrounded."
When Richtofen is surrounded.
"On my way, Doc. Only because I want to shank you myself."
When Richtofen is down or surrounded.
"Well, this will do the trick."
After buying a sickle.
"Hey Richtofen, speed dating again?"
When Richtofen is being chased by zombies.
"Holy Undead Space Monkeys!"
When starting a Space Monkey round
"Take that Romero maggot! (Reference to George Romero)"
After killing a Zombie
"An SMG... now I just need one for my other hand!"
After getting the Spectre from the Mystery Box.
"I can't stand prunes."
After buying PhD Flopper
"(Demented Laughing)"
After taking your Upgraded Ray Gun from the Pack-A-Punch machine
"Who's this guy?"
After Nikolai's Matryoshka Doll talks to him (possibly because he completely ignores nikolai)
"It's raining body parts, Richtofen will be so happy!"
After blowing off a limb.
"Is this a doll or an action figure?"
After a Matryoshka Doll talks to him
"This just turned the fun knob up to 11!"
After taking your Upgraded Ray Gun from the Pack-A-Punch machine
"Back up Buttercup."
Said after being hit by a Space Monkey.
"SCREW THAT STUPID BOX!"
-When attempting to get the box without enough points
"I don't like that Richtofen. I think I've seen him before Shi No Numa, in fact, I don't remember much at all..."
When Pack-A-Punching a weapon.

Nikolai

"Need to get the power on, so all this cool stuff turns on."
Said at the start of a game.
"I will help you, but only if you get me some vodka."
Responding to Gersh at the beginning of the game.
"My weapon is filled with bullets, my body is filled with vodka. All is good!"
After getting a Max Ammo.
"I need help, I don't care if it is Takeo."
After Getting down.
"So, Takeo DID have love affair with stuffed monkey! Look what they made!"
Randomly at the start of a Monkey Round.
"Cheer up! You guys last longer than my marriages!"
After killing a large group of Zombies
"There are plenty of zombies for everyone, I just happen to be killing them all!"
After killing multiple zombies.
"I used this to kill my relatives. -She was my fifth wife-"
after obtaining an assault rifle from the mystery box.
"Hey, be happy you last longer than my Marriages!"
After killing multiple zombies.
"I feel like a Capitalist, stealing all these kills!"
When getting multiple kills
"First objective: Turn on power. Second objective: Drink. Or vice versa. You know what I choose."
When starting a game
"I have sister who used to make these. She's bitch."
When activating the Matyroshka Doll easter egg or receiving one from the Mystery Box
"A cute little trinket. Maybe there's vodka inside, eh?"
When activating the Matyroshka Doll easter egg or receiving one from the Mystery Box
"The sound of your brain exploding is like music to my ears."
Randomly
"They're all dead, good time for drink."
After the nuke explosion.
"I use this to kill a bear, also known as first wife."
Buying a Shotgun off the wall
"If only divorce was this easy."
After killing a zombie with the Death Machine
"Yeah, yeah, I'm almost out of vodka...I mean, No power!"
When starting a game
"You touch me, I KILL YOU! Sounds like fair trade."
Nikolai after killing a zombie that just hit him
"Why is there never any power?"
When starting a game
"Am I drunk, or am I getting attacked by space monkeys?!"
Nikolai being attacked by a Space Monkey
"You are a fool for touching Nikolai!"
After killing a zombie that hit him.
"I've fallen and I cant get up!"
Nikolai being downed. A reference to Life alert.
"I'll have to use my bare hands... just like with fourth wife. Always talking..."
When out of ammo.
"What a handsome weapon, oh, that's my reflection. He he..."
After getting the Thundergun from the mystery box
"Let the carnage continue."
After a monkey round.
"I will help you, but only if you get me some vodka."
Said after hearing the voices at the start of the game.
"This I can not wait to use!"
Said after buying a SMG off the wall.
"Can anyone spare some ammo?"
When out of ammo.
"These things eventually run out!?"
When out of ammo.
"Can anyone spare some ammo?"
When out of ammo.
"****! I'm out of ammo!"
When out of ammo.
"I don't think throwing my gun at them will be as effective as having ammo.."
Said when out of ammo.
"My weapon is hungry for ammo!"
When out of ammo.
"I will aim carefully, pull the trigger at just the right time... wait, I am too drunk for this."
Sometimes said after buying the M14.
"Great, now I have to hold up both arms!"
after obtaining CZ75 dual wield
"They were like dominoes, da?"
Said after getting multiple headshots.
"That stripper DID take all my money!... Bitch..."
Said when trying to open a door without enough points. This is a reference to a Kino Der Toten quote under the same circumstances.
"Your eyes are empty, Takeo."
When his Matryoshka doll is talked to by Takeo.
"I hate you Richtofen."
When his matryoshka doll is talked to by Richtofen.
"Oh, hi, Dempsey."
When his matryoshka doll is talked to by Dempsey.
"I don't trust Takeo, I think he is up to something. Maybe he has been playing around with the monkey bomb."
Said sometimes while pack-a-punching and Takeo is nearby.
"I can't wish zombies dead, I need ammo!"
When out of ammo.
"Shh... I'm gonna take his head off."
After buying M14. A reference to Elmer Fudd from Looney Toons.
"Feel the wrath of the Motherland!"
After killing a zombie.
"I give too many of my bullets away!"
Said when low on ammo.
"HEY! You didn't get me a drink!"
After activating all 5 nodes.
"**** you Teddy Bear!"
When getting a Teddy Bear.
"Now, I am Russian bear!"
After buying Juggernaut.
""Ugh... I keep forgetting to update my Facebook page!"
Said during the use of the Pack-a-Punch machine.
"Russians only get this close to vodka!"
When a zombie hits Nikolai

Takeo

"Who are you?"
Replying to the man at the beginning.
"I must give light to this dark, dead place."
Takeo's first expressions on Ascension.
"Remember my name.. TAKEO!"
After knifing a zombie.
"That is it? THAT is ALL you have?"
After knifing a zombie.
"Slashing throats!"
After knifing a zombie.
"Bow down!"
After knifing a zombie.
"WHAT IS MY NAME?!"
After killing a zombie.
"Spilling blood, is the only joy I know!"
After killing a zombie.
"Back to your graves, death pigs!"
After killing a zombie.
"Take THAT, you soulless creature!"
After killing a zombie.
"Just like how the universe began, Big Bang!"
When killing Zombies with the Phd Floppers explosion.
"Grenades? I sense a good strategy with these."
Killing a couple of zombies with a grenade.
"I don't like that."
After jumping through the Gersch Device
"That doens't sound good."
Beginning of the monkey round.
"You dare laugh at Takeo!? "
After getting a Teddy Bear instead of a weapon.
"Still this boxs mocks me, with its thickle ways!"
Trying to buy the box, without the required 950 points. (Also replying to his comment in Kino der Toten.)
"And THAT was for my master! "
Getting a powerup.
"The strenght of my Ancestors powers me!"
Getting a Max Ammo.
"I must destroy more undead for this gift."
Trying to open a door/buy a weapon without the minimum required points.
"A Skill-less, yet powerfull weapon! "
Buying the Olympia.
"A most intresting weapon."
Buying the MP5K.
"I will cut them down... one limb at a time!"
Buying the Stakeout.
"One hundred twenty rounds per second. More then enough!"
Getting the Spectre from the box.
"This is what my dreams are made of."
Getting the Crossbow out of the box.
"Dempsey, you speak these monkeys' language, don't you? TELL THEM TO STOP STEALING MY PERKS!"
Upon dealing with the Space Monkeys.
"A taste that reminds me of home."
After buying Quick Revive.
"Juggernog is fuel for Honour!"
After buying Juggernog.
"This...makes my eyes water."
After buying PhD Flopper.
"I'm coming Edward!"
When Richtofen is being swarmed
"Keep fighting Doctor, I'll come save you!"
When Richtofen is being swarmed.
"Uhh, I feel funny."
After jumping through the Gersch Device
"Stay away from my Speed Cola!"
When Space Monkeys attack the Speed Cola machine.A possible reference to when Nikolai says "Stay away from my Vodka"
"They are stealing my Juggernog!"
When space monkeys are attacking Juggernog.
"They are taking revive!"
Takeo when the Space Monkeys are stealing Quick Revive.
"Get your hands off me you damn, dirty ape!"
After killing a monkey that recently attacked him. A reference to Planet of the Apes.
"Like the sushi, it's all in the cut!"
After knifing an enemy with a Sickle. (Not confirmed for knifing with combat knife.)
"It slices! It dices! It's a wonder!"
After knifing a zombie with a Sickle.
"One becomes two becomes three becomes...... Death!"
When talking to a matryoshka doll.
"How many surprises do you hide little one?"
When talking to a matryoshka doll.
"For the emperor!"
Takeo's Matryoshka Doll talking to Takeo.
"I will not work for you!"
Takeo's Matryoshka Doll talking to Nikolai.
"Good day, Doctor!"
Takeo's Matryoshka Doll talking to Richtofen.
"You, ugly American!"
Takeo's Matryoshka Doll talking to Dempsey.
"A toy that even I can play with!"
Takeo talking to Matryoshka Dolls.
"No ammo,no problem"
when out of ammo
"Zero ammo, double the honour!"
Takeo with no ammo.
"No ammo, or new weapon? Decisions...decisions..."
Takeo commenting about players often needing to choose between no ammo, or buying a new gun.
"Confused you say? Get more bullets dammit!"
Takeo breaking the fourth wall.
"No ammo, no weapons... now the real fight begins!"
Takeo with both weapons out of ammo.
"No more Mr. Nice Samurai!"
Upon getting his upgraded weapon.
"Ah, I have time to update my Facebook Status!"
While waiting for Pack-A-Punch to finish.
"I refuse to accept this fate!"
Takeo after being downed by zombies.
"No, not like this!"
Takeo after being downed by zombies.

Richtofen

"It's like mowing a lawn of flesh..."
When Richtofen kills a lot of zombies.
"The voices usually sound so angry!"
After hearing the voice talking at the start of a game.
"I do the dissections around here!"
When getting hit by a zombie
"Ze dirty monkeys are taking my juggernog!"
When the monkeys are attacking the Juggernog machine.
"Why is there no power?...Where did all the color go?......Who am I talking to?"
When starting a new game.
"BLAH! Get's me every time..."
After buying Revive Soda.
"Zis drink is my favorite, I cannot express how much I enjoy it's infinigrate taste and exceptional finish."
After buying Speed Cola. Also, Richtofen says this very quickly.
"Next Time they should take first class."
At the start of a monkey round.
"Die you demon!"
Randomly
"Oh,the inflation is killing me!"
When trying to open a door without enough points, a joke on the hyperinflation that occurred in the Weimar Republic (post WWI Germany), making the money nearly useless.
"They are so small now, I can put them in my pocket."
Said when he blows up a zombie.
"This weapon is empty!"
When running out of ammo
"Nein, nein, NEIN! I need more ammo!"
When running out of ammo
"Now, to find some ammo!"
When running out of ammo
"Without proper ammo, I cannot give zem proper death!"
When running out of ammo
"Why do the voices sound so ANGRY?"
Getting multiple kills
"Again,the doctor is victorious!"
Killing a zombie that hurt the player
"The ammo is low!"
When low on ammo
"Oh ja, this will work nicely."
Getting a SMG
"The screams of the dead fills my heart with joy!"
Getting multiple kills.
"BOOM...Goes the corpses."
Getting multiple grenade kills
"If given enough time I could create a generator from spare parts-why is it black and white now?"
Starting a game
"Eenie meenie miney SHOTGUN!"
Said when receiving a shotgun from the Mystery Box
"Hey! Zat little man is trying to steal my perks!"
Said when a space monkey is destroying a Perk-A-Cola machine.
"Tiny pieces.....in the wine!"
Said with any explosive kill, reference to the song Tiny Bubbles released in the 60s/70s
"The power! ...Oh look, they all fall down."
Said with a Thundergun kill
"Oh, that must hurt so good."
Said with a Thundergun kill
"Fly... Fly Children! FLY!"
Said with a Thundergun kill
"DON'T LOOK DO- oh, too late."
Said with a Thundergun kill
"I used to crush these when I was a child to hear my sister cry in anguish."
Said when interacting with a Matryoshka Doll.
"I do like the sound of this one... It tickles my special place."
Said upon activating the musical easter egg
"It rubs the lotion on the doll, it does this every time... Or else it gets the hose again."
When interacting with a Matryoshka doll. Also a reference to the movie, "Silence of the Lambs".
"Oh, there's a doll inside a doll inside a doll! Sounds perverse..."
Upon interacting with a Matryoshka Doll.
"Dempsey must be the one turning off the power... he probably stole all the color too."
When starting a new game
"They seem to have infinite power...oh wait no they don't."
When killing a Space Monkey
"I see one, two, thr-- oh shit."
When being targeted by large group of zombies.
"Ach, don't breath on me!"
When his Matryoshka doll talks to Nikolai Belinski.
"It has "Doctor" in the title. Just like me!"
Upon purchasing PhD Flopper, a joke on the popular soda Dr. Pepper.
"Ha ha ha! Stop tickling me!"
When talking to his own Matryoshka doll.
"Oh hi Takeo!"
When his Matryoshka doll talks to Takeo Masaki.
"Big Dempsey you're SOOO BIIIG!"
When his Matryoshka doll talks to Tank Dempsey.
"Maybe we should help this... thing."
When the generator is sucked into the Gersch Device.
"This Kassimir Mechanism sounds intriguing!"
When node one of the Kassimir Mechanism is completed.
"Ahhhh, this is just too much fun!"
When node two of the Kassimir Mechanism is completed
"You've already have this much power and you've want more?!? ... I like the way you think."
Upon using the Gersch Device near the Kassimir Mechanism when all the nodes are active. The Russian scientist will say that there is still not enough power on which Richtofen would comment.
"Gather around, gather around... it's story time, my children..."
After getting a headshot.
"Dempsey did you steal my ammo."
When having no ammo.
"At least it isn't throwing shit."
After being attacked by a Space Monkey.
"MY FOOT!"
After a Space Monkey hits his foot.
"Oh ze little demons go boom!"
Upon getting a nuke.
""Now you could fit into a gumball machine... and I could have a piece of you for a quarter. WHO HAS A QUARTER!? Dempsey???"
After blowing up a zombie.
"I'm not dead,(quietly)not yet."
After being revived (could be a reference to Monty Python and the Holy Grail).
"Not as accurate as my formulas, but it will do"
After buying an SMG.
"Wow the Thundergun. What a boring name."
After getting the Thundergun

Gersch

"Please.. Help me.. She's coming! The mechanism must be repaired."
Said at start of game.
"You've done it! Now, it needs as much power as possible. Hurry, she's getting nearer!"
Said after generator is sucked into Gersch Device.
"Three more! No, stop it!"
After activating Node 1 in the Node Puzzle.
"It needs to be more concentrated power for this to work!"
After activating Node 2 in the Node Puzzle.
"Yes, YES! Almost there! Hurry! She's coming! LUNA!!"
After activating Node 3 in the Node Puzzle.
"Ah yes, I'm free! I cannot thank you enough for releasing me."
After completing the easter egg.