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#11. Posted:
ZSOE
  • 2 Million
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Pretty good job man. 8/10
#12. Posted:
SynysterSniper
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Where does Jimmy stay?

And if you need ideas:

Make font bigger so it's "longer"
Give a few scenarios when he gets caught/barely gets away

etc

8/10
#13. Posted:
kahlua_xo
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9/10 i dont like books a lot but this one is really good keep going(:
#14. Posted:
Cloudman
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9/10
Love Your Choice Of Words
Lol
Keep up The good Work!
#15. Posted:
Track_Field
  • Prospect
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Solid 8 bro nice job keep it up!
#16. Posted:
WantedDeathcrow
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Thats quite good i wanna read more
9/10 XD
#17. Posted:
iMayhem
  • Powerhouse
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revise it dude tons of errors
#18. Posted:
Flabbies
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Fix the spelling and grammar errors and work on enhancing the sentence structure. They tend to run on and are very generic sounding. Try using original and underused adjectives but dont use crazy unknown words. Also, the main story line is kind of over used. The whole drunk dad, mom is never there, rebel kid is really old. Keep the main idea but tweak it a little to make it sound different. Overall, i give it a 5/10 right now. Good luck on the rest of it!
#19. Posted:
Auyoe
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Just thought of a great idea this book is going to take a total turn!!
#20. Posted:
thiskidchris
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make sure you start out with a good thesis. something that grabs our attention. but other that thta it was good.
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