1.
Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a gun shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says "OK, now what?"

2.
4. A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself. Hysterically the blonde responds to the husband, ''Shut up...you're next!''

PS4 wrote what do you call a black priest

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] Holy $hit

I'm black btw and find this hilarious

I white and i find this hilarious xD Grats! And btw good jokes today people!

What does a buffalo say to his son when he leaves to school?

Bison

A man goes to the doctor and says, Doctor, wherever I touch, it hurts.
The doctor asks, What do you mean?
The man says, When I touch my shoulder, it really hurts. If I touch my knee - OUCH! When I touch my forehead, it really, really hurts.
The doctor says, I know whats wrong with you - youve broken your finger!

Michael j. Fox's enemy is the Etch-A-Sketch. Because of Parkinsons.

Several men are in the locker room of a golf club. A cell phone on a bench rings and a man engages the hands-free speaker-function and begins to talk. Everyone else in the room stops to listen.
MAN: Hello
WOMAN: Honey, its me. Are you at the club?
MAN: Yes
WOMAN: Im at the mall now and found this beautiful leather coat. Its only $1,000. Is it OK if I buy it?
MAN: Sure, go ahead if you like it that much.
WOMAN: I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the new2006 models. I saw one I really liked.
MAN: How much?
WOMAN: $68,000.
MAN: OK, but for that price I want it with all the options.
WOMAN: Great! Oh, and one more thing.The house we wanted last year is back on the market. Theyre asking $950,000.
MAN: Well, then go ahead and give them an offer, but just offer
$900,000.
WOMAN: OK. Ill see you later! I love you!
MAN: Bye, I love you, too.

What is the main difference between Men and Women?

What comes to their minds when they hear the word facial.

MSB wrote What is the main difference between Men and Women?

What comes to their minds when they hear the word facial.

HAHA thanks for the laugh! Have fun with the gold!

Q-What animal should you never play cards with?
A-A cheetah!

y0 maaama joke


you mum so old I told her to act her age and she died[/quote]