I went to an American restaurant last night for the first time, I sampled a few things, about 20 mins in I realized why 1 in 10 Americans has the diabeetus. (1 in 3 by 2030).. You fry or batter EVERYTHING.

I had the sample platter to start, BATTERED FRIED CHEESE STICKS.. Wut?! Onion ring TOWER (yeah they stacked like 20 of them into a tower) stuffed jalapeno peppers (they were yummy) Potato skins (also delicious) And with all this came the most disgustingly huge tub-like dish of blue cheese dip.

Then mains came, holy **** shit.. I ordered a CAESER SALAD, what I got was lettuce that had been mulched in what I can only imagine is a machine meant to disintegrate hardwood because my lettuce was DECIMATED... My crutons were 1inch by 1inch butter fried wholemeal bread pieces, there was about a metric ton of bacon and chicken in it and the WHOLE THING was **** DRENCHED!! in caeser dressing. I seriously, halfway through got Angina for the first time as my heart desperately tried to figure out what to do with the 30-40grams of Salt and 30K+ calories....

The waitress was lovely though and I tried cherry coke and doctor pepper for the first times (both taste identical) and at the very end of the meal I asked the waitress when the bill was coming?? And she told me that you die at the end of fallout 3 new vegas