what is long, brown, and goes in girls' mouths?


SNICKERS!
pm me if i win

thers is a blonde a redhead and a brunette they are running from the cops. they all hide in a barn the brunetter hides with the cows when the cops walk by the cows the brunette gows mooo mooo. they jeep walking. the redhead hides with the sheep when the cops walk by the edhead goes bahh bahh. the blonde hides with a sack of potatos when the cops walk by the blonde goes potatoes potatoes and she is captured please pm me if i win thank you


number 2 A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: Thats the ugliest baby that Ive ever seen. Ugh! The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: The driver just insulted me! The man says: You go right up there and tell him off go ahead, Ill hold your monkey for you

When taking the SAT write Chuck Norris for every anwser. Your score will be over nine thousand.

dont get mad:

A little kid asks his father, "Daddy, is God a man or a woman?"

"Both son. God is both."

After a while the kid comes again and asks, "Daddy, is God black or white?"

"Both son, both."

The child returns a few minutes later and says, "Daddy, is Michael Jackson God?"

Joke 1:
there are 3 people on a plane and is going down 1 is a cook the other is a chef and the 3rd is a soldier so they all throw something out of the plane the cook throws a apple then parachutes down the foot ball player throws a football and parachutes down then the soldier throws a live grenade then parachutes down then the chef lands and sees a crying kid and says whats wrong and the kid says an apple hit me on the head then the football player lands and sees a crying kid also and ask whats wrong and the kid says a football hit me on the head then the soldier lands and sees a kid laughing and says whats so funny and he says daddy farted and the house blew up!!!!!!!!!!!!

Joke2:
A bear and a rabbit are taking a sh*t in the woods when the bear turns and says "excuse me Mr Rabbit but do you have any problems with sh*t sticking to your fur"? the rabbit replies no... so the bear wipes his ass with the rabbit.
an Englishman an Irishman and a pakistani were walking down the street...



Some more

what a great example of a multicutural society
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why did the hedgehog cross the road?
to meet his flatmate
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two cows in a field one says 'moo' the other one says 'you basterd i was going to say that'
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an englishmen a scotishman and an irishman were abducted by people who said that if they could select a piece of fruit and squeeze 10 pieces of it up there arse without laughing they could go
Englishman: apples, fits around
5 but cant do any mor so he dies
scotishman: grapes gets 9 but then bursts out laughing
the englishman asks the scottisman why he laughed and he said:
'i just saw the irishman come back with pineapples!






Hope i win


8)

ok heres a funny joke man duty lol

everything that starts with p... ends with orn ...
NO NO NO.. its :

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Ok 3 guys are in Germany speeding down he highway going 20 over the speed limit. They don't have a Driver Licence or any I.D. They get pulled over one guy says " hey its a girl cop, maybe we'll have luck". The cop asks for I.D they say they don't have any their foreigners. She says OK...... I won't arrest you guys on 1 condition. They say sure anything. She says if your penises are over 18 inches combined you guys can go. So the first guy takes his pant down she measures his dick its 12 inches,,... 2nd guy goes his dick measures 5 inches. They say this should be easy we need 1 more inch. The third guy goes his dick measures 1inch. The cop goes im a lady of my word you guys can go.

Once she leaves the third guy goes "YOU GUYS ARE LUCKY I HAD A BONER"!!!!!!!!!!

Wait. Nevermind.
I'm entering with this.

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